Too much of nothing

I can't seem to sit and write a blog post at the moment, I think there's too much of nothing going around my head for anything coherent to come out. So here is a mishmash of thoughts:

These long holidays are still dragging. I won't lie, it's been hard. Some days I think "Hmmm maybe it's not that hot outside, maybe we can go and have a little play or a picnic or something." Then I step outside and my skin nearly bubbles off and buckets of sweat pours off me. It really is just too hot to do anything outdoors, at all, even at night. We have all acclimatised pretty well and we do spend a little more time outside than we did when we first arrived in the middle of summer. The thing the heat is just unrelenting. There are no cool changes or southerly busters or tropical storms that bring even the slightest bit of relief. When the wind picks up it's blustery - it's like a hair dryer blowing full force in your face, with bits of sand for added pleasure. This lasts for months and months. I don't think it's anything you can really understand or appreciate until you've done it.

At least one a day, every single day, one of the kids is reduced to tears and says: "Why do we live in such a hot country?!" usually while getting in or out of the car.

I think if we didn't have kids it would be a huge amount easier. While you do yearn to get outside and just go for a walk or sit on the grass, you can survive. With the kids, it's difficult, there's only so much you can do. I think I can safely say this will probably be the last time I spend the majority of the long summer holiday here, the two weeks away was lovely but not enough to cure the cabin fever.

Every morning and every evening I'm gripped with the awful feeling "what am I going to do with them to fill another day?"

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As well as trying to fill the days and keep the kids active and happy, it's been very isolating for me. All my parent friends have left for the summer, so quite often I only speak to the kids for the whole day. If Skip is away for work (as he is at the moment ), then I probably won't have a proper conversation with another adult.

Poor Skip probably (definitely) gets his ear chewed of with mundane musings when he is around, which is just what you want after a long stressful day at work!


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On the positive side, the kids and I are spending a lot of good time together and there has been some fun and a lot of laughs. Time that I know I'll look back on with fondness.

Also, the kids are really looking forward to going back to school. I think they'll dive back into it very easily and we won't have the added transition of settling back in Dubai or getting used to the heat again.

It's also making us very excited about our trip back to Australia for Christmas. There have already been making conversations about going out on Grandpa's boat, possible sleepovers, catching up with cousins and friends.


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As I've said before, I'm not really a person who gets homesick. I miss people, of course, and there are times when I feel a bit sad or nostalgic, but overall I don't pine for Australia. Occasionally though something will pop in my mind and I'll feel a wash of emotion. Sometimes it will be really wanting to sit and chat and laugh with a certain person and other times it will be something quite silly. Like yesterday, I suddenly thought of raisin toast. Hot, buttery, delicious raisin toast. We don't really get it here ( I don't think) and I hadn't even thought about it at all, then suddenly all I could think about was raisin toast and I got the strongest pangs on homesickness. Strange.


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Someone from home the other day asked me if I still felt safe living in the Middle East. While there is so much chaos and confusion going on literally around us, I do feel very safe here. The vast majority of the time I feel safer living here than I do in Australia. I often leave my handbag unattended or my car door unlocked. People close to us attend church each week on land given to them by the government. They can worship without fear of persecution. People are friendly to me and my family.


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So that is what is going on in my brain at the moment.